HW 21 - Expert #1

1. Beth Husband foot blow up.
2. Eric was 90 pounds
3. Beth  didn't want her older son to see his father, while he was in college
4. Beth went to see a buddtist
5. Beth continued  to do her husband art work
6. Never spoke about his death comming
7. Eric was a jolly man, he was the man that every body liked
8. there was a stillness when he died

In class while Beth was talking, I'm thinking in my head "Wow she is a strong woman, but how is she able to talk about her husband death without crying". If I were to gone up there I would have been crying the whole time.  But I was crying inside, my heart hurt while she spoke about the experience of her husband death.  It surprised me when Beth mentioned her husband was about 90 pounds, when he died. The reason why it did is because it’s a difference between 200 and 90 pounds, she mentioned he died like a vegetable, I pictured once a healthy man and now just skin and bone. I never seen anybody so sick or knew anybody that had to stay in the hospital for a long period of time, but when my friend got food poisoning I helped him, with getting water. I made sure I was there and I didn't want to move. When Beth made sure she was by her husband side, I could tell they had a strong relationship and she wasn't giving up on him. I think that’s most important between people is to not give up on one another.  This is where people start to believe and say "things will get better" I don't think people should pretend if a person is sick to pretend they will get better.  When someone is sick it’s better to give positive energy and then your grief. This what Beth did. This also made me think about a friend I once had, He is an alcoholic I thought about him dying while Beth was talking. It made my heart hurt even more. When I was thirteen years old me knowing this person, I didn't want to be around him much because all he did was drink, but he wasn't a bad person he just needed a person to talk too.  He told me stories how he got his stomach pumped and every time I saw him he smelled and he was always sweating. At one point I felt so bad, that I did a whole search for a rehab for him, but he didn't listen.  I stop becoming friends with this person because I was young and I didn't understand why he couldn't stop if he knew his health was in danger, why continue harming yourself? I thought. He was coming to me, asking me to solve his problems and I couldn't. This made me uncomfortable. I couldn't help him with his problems all I could offer was to listen and be nice to him at the time.  I can say he is still alive, but Beth telling her story made me think about he can die too.

In our society, we try to make things work out best for the person is sick is by going to the hospital. Which can help, but there’s also something missing, which is faith and knowing will the person we care for die in a peace full death. This is where I believe spirituality grows and it’s important to have support for in ourselves. It’s like feeling pain for the person and yourself, but you want to stay strong so you look for messages that can help you.  This is where Beth talking about when she went to a Buddhist, I guess to feel support for her ?She talked about how the Buddhist told her  he would stop talking, and he would push away his arms in the air  as though he knew he was going to die pretty soon. This happened to her husband.  I would say I would so the same, to look for a message to help my sprit lift, so that my weakness don’t overcome me. Looking for medical help, I feel don’t help all the time because they just tend to drug you, and keep the person so that they can die in the hospital. Beth didn’t do this for her husband; she wanted to be by her husband side.  I don’t know Beth personally but her experience made me have questions about the purpose of life. Talking about her husband death was an experience for me.